Have I Been Cursed?
Every week—no exaggeration—I get at least two messages that begin with the same question: “I think I’ve been cursed. Can you tell me if I have?” Sometimes it’s worded differently. “My luck is terrible lately, could someone have hexed me?” Or: “I can’t shake this feeling of doom. Did a neighbor send me the evil eye?”
I always pause before answering. Not because I don’t believe in curses—I do. I’ve seen them, I’ve felt their weight, and I’ve undone them. But because nine times out of ten, the “curse” in question didn’t come from someone else. It came from the person asking.
The Curse Question
Let’s start here: human beings are meaning-making creatures. When something bad happens, we look for patterns. We want a reason. If three appliances break in the same month, if our relationship is rocky, if we can’t seem to land a job—we start to wonder if unseen forces are stacked against us. And for those who believe in magic, “curse” becomes the tidy explanation.
But here’s the secret most witches won’t tell you up front: belief is the most powerful spell of all. If you believe you’re cursed, you’re halfway to making it real. Not because there’s necessarily a hex sitting on your doorstep, but because your thoughts, emotions, and expectations shape your lived reality.
This isn’t just spiritual fluff. Psychology backs it up. Our brains are primed to notice evidence that supports what we already believe. It’s called confirmation bias. If you’re convinced bad luck dogs you, you’ll spot every minor misfortune as proof. That bias pairs beautifully (or terribly) with self-fulfilling prophecy: when you expect failure, you unconsciously act in ways that sabotage your success.
In folk magic, we might call that “crossing yourself.”
Curses Are Real (But Rare)
Before we go too far, let me be clear: yes, curses exist. In the traditions I work with, there are long histories of people using malefic magic to settle scores, protect their land, or send a clear warning. A curse is deliberate. It takes energy, intent, and usually ritual action. It’s not something someone does by accident because they were jealous of your haircut.
But because curses require effort, they’re far less common than you’d think. Most witches aren’t out here spending hours of their lives hexing random strangers. That nosy coworker you’re worried about? She probably doesn’t have the knowledge or the motivation. The neighbor who glares at you? Likely just grumpy.
What is common is the evil eye—the unconscious projection of envy or malice. That, too, can tangle things up, but even then, the strength of the evil eye depends largely on how much you allow it to take root in your own mind.
Which brings us back to the main point: more often than not, the biggest curse is the one we place on ourselves.
How We Curse Ourselves
So how do we end up crossing ourselves without meaning to? Here are some of the most common ways I see it happen in my practice:
1. Words as Spells
When you tell yourself “I’ll never catch a break” or “Nothing good ever happens to me”, you’re casting a spell. Repetition makes it stronger. Eventually, you begin living into those words as though they were carved into your fate.
2. Feeding Fear
If you wake up every day scanning for signs that you’re cursed, you’ll find them. Spilling coffee, tripping on the sidewalk, missing a text—suddenly, they all look like proof. This constant fear drains your energy and blocks opportunities that could shift your luck.
3. Neglecting Spiritual Hygiene
In folk traditions, cleansing isn’t just for undoing curses. It’s everyday upkeep. But when you stop tending to your spirit—whether through prayer, meditation, baths, or offerings—you can start to feel heavy and stagnant. That heaviness gets mistaken for an outside hex when really, it’s just accumulated gunk.
4. Clinging to Resentment
Holding onto grudges can boomerang. Anger is powerful fuel, and if we stew in it long enough, it becomes a slow-burn curse against ourselves. Resentment blocks blessings and keeps us tethered to the very person or situation we want to move past.
5. Ignoring Practical Realities
Sometimes what looks like a curse is just life. Poor money management, unhealthy relationships, lack of sleep—all these things can create a storm of problems. If we don’t address the mundane root causes, we trick ourselves into thinking a supernatural force is at work.
Breaking a Self-Curse
The good news? If you’ve been cursing yourself, you also have the power to break it. You don’t need a witch to swoop in and fix it for you (though guidance can help). Here are some simple ways to uncross yourself:
Cleanse Regularly
Spiritual baths with salt, herbs, or even just intention can clear out stagnant energy. Smoke cleansing, sweeping with a broom, or washing your floors with lemon are all time-honored practices. Think of it as psychic spring cleaning.
Watch Your Words
Start treating what you say as spellwork—because it is. Speak kindly to yourself. Replace “I’m so unlucky” with “I’m opening to new opportunities.” Write affirmations and actually believe them.
Reset the Mind
Meditation, journaling, or prayer can help quiet the spiral of negative thoughts. When you catch yourself assuming doom, pause and redirect. It sounds small, but over time, it changes everything.
Ground in Reality
Check the mundane before the magical. If you’re worried about a financial curse, look at your budget. If your health feels hexed, see a doctor. Magic and the material world are partners, not competitors.
Protection Work
A simple protective charm, like a piece of iron, a sprig of rosemary, or a protective sigil, can give you peace of mind. Sometimes the act of carrying protection itself breaks the self-curse by reassuring your spirit.
When It Really Is a Curse
Of course, sometimes the problem is external. Signs of an actual curse can include:
A sudden, sharp decline in multiple areas of life at once.
Illness or accidents with no clear medical explanation.
Repeated dreams or omens tied to a specific person.
Objects on your property that feel deliberately placed or out of place (like jars, powders, or strange bundles).
Even then, the first step is the same: cleanse and protect. In most folk traditions, undoing a curse doesn’t require anything dramatic—just consistent, humble work. And often, the act of reclaiming your own power is enough to break the spell.
Why We Reach for the Curse Explanation
Here’s something I’ve noticed: many people who ask me if they’re cursed aren’t really asking about magic. They’re asking if the universe sees them, if the suffering they’re experiencing has meaning, if they have any power to change it. A curse is, paradoxically, comforting. If someone else cursed you, then the chaos in your life isn’t random—it’s explainable, and maybe even fixable.
But if you accept that sometimes life is messy, that hardship comes without reason, it can feel scarier. So people reach for the curse explanation as a way to organize the chaos.
As a witch, I see part of my role as helping people recognize that they do have power, curse or no curse. Even when the world feels against you, your own spirit is your first ally.
The Witch’s Perspective
After years of practice, here’s my honest take: yes, curses are real, but they’re not the boogeyman most people imagine. You’re far more likely to be weighed down by your own words, thoughts, and fears than by your enemy’s ritual.
If you’ve been feeling cursed, ask yourself:
Am I feeding this belief with my own attention?
Have I neglected my spiritual and practical upkeep?
Am I using “curse” as a catch-all explanation for life’s challenges?
Then take small steps to cleanse, protect, and redirect your energy. Most of the time, you’ll feel the weight lift almost immediately—not because a curse was broken, but because you stopped carrying one you didn’t need to.
Final Thoughts
The question “Have I been cursed?” isn’t going away. People will keep asking it, and I’ll keep answering it with compassion. But I’ll also keep telling the truth: more often than not, the only curse you need to worry about is the one you’ve spoken over yourself.
That’s not meant to dismiss your pain. It’s meant to remind you that you hold the power. You can bless yourself as easily as you can curse yourself. You can choose words, habits, and practices that call in protection, luck, and peace.
The world is already hard enough. Don’t add to the weight by crossing yourself. Instead, step into your own role as a maker of meaning, a shaper of energy, a caster of blessings. Because in the end, the strongest witchcraft you’ll ever wield is the spell of what you believe about your own life.
